It's been about nine weeks since the new school year began. That means that report cards will be coming home soon, and not long after, my phone will start ringing.

Grades can reveal many issues

School performance has a way of exposing many of the struggles of the teen years, and not just the academic ones.

Teens tend to start the school year in one of three ways: the good start, the bad start and the no start. Many kids get off to a good start, and that's good. The next challenge is to keep it up. What happens occasionally, however, is that silly old habit of resting on our laurels after we meet a goal.

As soon as you start resting, things begin to slip. Kids stop studying as much, they forget about homework, etc. Parents also can contribute to this by thinking that the good start means that they, too, can relax and stop keeping track of how their kid is doing.

A good start

The best thing to do with a good start is to keep it going. Kids need to keep doing all the things that got them off to a good start. Parents need to keep a watchful eye in order to stay on top of what is going on. Remember, a goal is not something you reach and then stop. A goal is something you reach and then pass through on the way to bigger and better things.

A bad start

Some report cards reveal that kids have gotten off to a bad start. Perhaps the first few weeks went well, but then they got behind and just gave up. If it's the first year of middle or high school, the issue might be one of a difficult adjustment to a new school and new routines.

Other kids have never learned how to study and organize for more than one class. I've worked with many kids who were bright enough that for many years all they had to do was show up to do well, but now they have to work a little harder and are unwilling to or don't know how. Whatever the reason, there are many things you can do as a parent.

Ask your kids what they think happened. You will probably get "I don't know," which is to be expected. Try asking, "If you did know, what would it be?"

Your next step is to meet with the teachers and guidance counselor for a conference. Find out what is happening in each class. Ask lots of questions, such as "What do you recommend we do at this point?" Discuss the possibility of any learning problems.

The good news is there are many resources that specialize in helping students with learning or homework problems. If school is becoming a power struggle or battle ground for you and your child, seek the help of a family counselor who specializes in working with kids and teens.

No start at all

Every now and then, kids start the school year by not starting out at all. You typically see all D's and F's on the first report card and lots of absences. If they are in class, they are disruptive or sleeping. Usually they are skipping class and/or not showing up for school at all.

This kind of start tells me that something big is going on and it's not good. It could be anything from depression to drugs, and anything in between.

If your student fits this pattern, make an appointment right away with a family counselor who specializes in working with teens. This kind of start indicates that the school year is at stake, and your teen is at stake as well.